The Scale is my Frenemy

This weekend my beloved husband and I traveled the high end of 1000 miles in 3 days. We attended the wedding and reception of his younger brother. It was a wonderful time with family and friends, bride and groom were stunning and a good time was had by all. The reception was in Green River, and for those of you that don't know, Doug's family owns a doughnut shop, which provided doughnuts at the reception.

Let me just say, I know full well this is no one's fault but my own. BUT those doughnuts were so freaking good that I ate 3 of them. Oh yeah, count it back, I said 3. Also, when we were in Utah I ate at In and Out Burger. A burger, french fries AND a shake. I didn't even figure out my weekend consumption of points because I was certain beyond certain that it was an outrageous amount of points. So, I came home and I resumed my regular "healthier" eating habits and picked up on the exercise hard core. I don't know if you know what Insanity is, but it will kick your butt. Sean T is hard core and I have the aching muscles to prove it.

All this to say, I entered my weight watchers meeting today confident that the numbers on the scale wouldn't be that bad. I took off my coat, stepped on the scale, closed my eyes and heard my meeting coordinator say, "A gain of .5 pounds." She whispered it quietly to me so no one else heard the words, but I felt like she just as well shout it form the mountain tops the way those words echoed in my brain. Now, really, lets be honest. I ate 3 doughnuts. I ate fast food. I traveled. Really, a half pound gain in a week is not that bad. In fact, I should almost be happy about it. So, why, then am I so sad? I text my husband. It went like this:

Me: Maybe I am just destined to be fat.
Doug: You're not fat.
Me: Well, chunky then.
Doug: How about beautiful and stupid

I heart my husband. Like, a lot. He can make me feel better about almost anything in this world with his humor. After consulting one of my BGF's her advice was pretty simple. Paraphrased: "You're beautiful, embrace your body it's this way for a reason, stop obsessing, tell anyone who calls you fat to f**k off or you'll tattle to Mom." My Mom is a scary woman. That might work. (Notice the advice of a woman was much longer and heartfelt than the simplicity of the love from my husband - that is why we need both love AND friends....balance)

So I sat through my meeting thinking about the ways I can do better this week. With GNO on the horizon I am thinking I need to make good food decisions all week to make up for the pizza or Italian or Chinese I plan on consuming on Saturday. Oh, and add one work out. I am thinking all of this when my WW leader asks me to share the moment when I decided I wanted to join. So I tell her. I got comfortable in my marriage. My husband loves me the way I am so I got comfortable and I got chunky. Then, the most precious advice of all came in her words....

"You're right. He does love you the way you are. So don't get discouraged from half pound set backs. Be happy knowing you're fine the way you are, you just want to change your body to feel better about yourself, and tomorrow is a brand new day."

You know what meeting leader, you are SO right. I want to change the way I look for me. Not for him, not for my family, for me. So, I enjoyed some In and Out. I ate 3 doughnuts. Tomorrow is a brand new day....and just when I thought all hope was lost....I got in the truck to drive home and this song was playing on the radio. A sign wouldn't you say?